For Me? Because "Vegan" Isn't a Real Thing.

I wouldn't say that I "hate" vegans, but I do find the notion of being a vegan (as opposed to vegetarian) monumentally stupid.  The issue is that there is no such thing as vegan in the real world.  I suppose that if you got your 5 acres properly planted and maintained the ecosystem in some ideal fashion you could avoid eating any product of animal labors or whatever they're calling it, but even then, probably not!

First note: a vegitarian diet generally kills lots of animals.  Not for eating, but just because farming of many plant products kills lots of small animals.  Sure, they aren't deliberately killed, and they weren't kept in captivity, but the act of producing a loaf of bread will also produce dead animals.

The specific issue with veganism is that you aren't supposed to even use animals as a labor input to your food (e.g. no honey), but there is approaching zero farming that does not use animal input.  Specifically pollination.  Much pollination in this country is from honey bees that are kept (farmed) and moved around to polinate fields.  Without pollination, no food (well, a lot less). 

The fact is that being humane to animals does not require even a vegetarian diet, but if you don't want to eat the flesh of animals, I get that (and you're probably healthier than me), but to extend that to full veganism is, from a logical perspective, stupid.  If you don't like cheese and eggs (or honey or dairy more generally, or wear leather or...) that's fine, but calling that a separate diet from "vegetarian" is a level of smug that is both unnecessary and inappropriate.  You are certainly profiting from the work of animals, and your diet does result in the death of animals.  So vegetarian is a diet choice.  Vegan is really just a smug "lifestyle" choice.